My Irish Eyes Aren’t Smiling

Thanks to “Mayor” Sheehan for yanking me off the injured reserve bench to weigh in on her recent “alcohol” ban for Albany St. Paddy’s Day parade. I had requested that a local elected attend this meeting but most are so disgusted with the current administration, they considered attending the meeting a frustrating waste of time. So, I’m pleased that the TU provided an article illustrating the chaos typical of any decision coming out of the “Mayor’s” office.

Finally, the TU illuminates the disorganization of Albany’s current administration from the same perspective that I’ve seen it! Thank you TU for peeking behind that prog curtain.

When the budget was first released, it was whispered to me that the St. Paddy’s parade was not in the budget. For month’s I’ve anticipated the chaos when the freshman administration of “know-it-alls” attempts to eliminate the annual parade. Here’s the fun part…all the local politicos, along with their a-teams,  attend 9AM mass at Blessed Sacrament  Church.

After mass, there is a huge breakfast…in which absolutely no Jameson’s is involved. The mass attendees then toddle over to the North Albany American Legion Post where the bar is open and ready for business.  (And rather busy!!) It is here that the North Albany Irish prove that their Irish celebrating genes are far superior to the younger crowd already lining up along Central Avenue in anticipation of our annual Albany tradition.

At 11AM, our Irish leaders (and those who wish they were Irish AND/OR leaders) lead a parade through North Albany that can only be compared to my Mother’s annual yet impromptu New Year’s Eve parade of Irish family and friends beating on pots with wooden spoons as they trip around our Dallas neighborhood.  My Mother added to this post, “don’t forget that the leader gets to carry the broom!!”

Following that parade, the “exhausted” revelers retreat to the Post  for a pint or three along with a smack or two of Jameson’s and a hot dog cooked and served up by some local Judges. (No comment on their disposition at that time.) As you might guess, several Irish stragglers are left at the Post and often join the main event on Central midway through the route…red solo cup in hand.

In the meantime, the union folks have gathered in bars and halls close to the kick off in front of Pauley’s Hotel at Central and Quail. (It’s quite a fiasco…and I recommend attending the parade kickoff before your next visit to the polls.) Promptly (or promptly in terms of an Irish St. Paddy’s buzz) at 2PM, the parade begins with a wobbly meander towards downtown Albany.

Along the way, the participants in the Main Event hug parade watching citizens, friends, enemies and strangers until finally reaching the finish line where they’ve picked up a few new friends along the way and a continuation of the St. Patrick’s celebration is continued indefinitely.

Now that you know the politico’s traditions behind the Albany St. Paddy’s Parade, how might “Mayor” Sheehan’s alcohol ban work? We already know that the leaders and some union folks (I’ll not say which but you may guess) will not be abstaining as they will begin participating in the Irish traditions by 9AM.  So, even if the parade participants refrain from the public drink….they may already be candidates for the “Mayor’s” very own drunk ticketing.

While there are many complaints and suggestions for alternatives to “Mayor” Sheehan’s parade, I can’t recommend boycotting downtown Albany….nope, instead, I recommend house parties galore.  I encourage my rowdy State Street neighbors to continue the St. Paddy’s day tradition of an alcohol laden breakfast and brunch...and then meander over to Washington/Central  Ave in time for the celebrants to bless us with their presence.

And, what the heck, bring your coolers full of Irish beverages…bring your Harps, bring your Guinness…bring your Jameson’s on ice…and drink, drink as much as you want. I’m betting that the police ignore the “Mayor’s” ticket mandate and, instead, obey logic. The police are not on duty to ticket peaceful citizens enjoying an Albany tradition…and it doesn’t make one bit of difference if “Mayor” Sheehan tells them to. Think of the lawsuits when one person out of five is ticketed/arrested!! Hello Mark Mishler!!!

Logic must prevail on Saturday…. the “Mayor’s” plan to ticket all drinkers….or drinkettes…or recovering drinkettes…is not logical not feasible…and not in the best interest of the City of Albany.

For good measure, I WILL be drinking some good Irish beer at the parade on Saturday…if the APD wants to ticket me….they may send the ticket in advance so that I don’t monopolize the time the APD can be ticketing other good Irish folk. Just in case my readers are wondering, I have never had a single drink at any of the Albany parades, including St. Patrick’s…not a single drink….but I’m breaking my tradition in protest of “Mayor” Sheehan’s “Idiocrocy.”

I invite you all to join me in protest.

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